House of Brews

Whether you like it or not (yes, you), the House of Brews Clan will be invading the Windy City this summer for the first EVER HoBfest. A number of days and nights will be spent within the bounds of the city wherein we will participate in activities such as beer drinking, killing hookers, laughing, and drinking more beer. Exact date and location have yet to be set, but we'll figure these things out eventually, right after we get a ballpark idea of exactly how many of you drunken fucks will be swerving your ass all the way to this thing...

Be sure to reply in this thread if you're interested, so we know what the fuck we need to book. Failure to reply will get you slapped in the cock if you show up anyways, and we'll probably force you to sleep with Dan (MyTwinSilencer) as well, though we're pretty sure that bleeding out of the ass and crying for 8 hours probably doesn't qualify as sleeping.

Also, be sure to contact me if you're interested in being a part of the group that gets to dispose of all those hooker bodies too. After all, they aren't going to eat themselves, you know...

If you haven't noticed lately, a few of us have been hanging out by playing Jailbreak Source lately and have had quite a bit of fun with it. Jailbreak is a free HL2 mod which puts dinosaurs, robots, and the a bit of the legal system together to make a fairly unique and interesting multiplayer experience. It's got some cool weapons and a lot of polish in the newest version, so if you'd like to pick it up and give it a go with us you can find it right here.

Did I mention it's free?

There's also Guilty Gear XX #Reloaded which is a free fighting game with some pretty good effects in it. It originally came out for Playstation 2, but was ported to PC and released for free with some bonus content. It takes some patching to get it to work online, but if you ask one of us who have been playing it lately (Pinch, Radimus, Weena, Nuke, or a few others) we'd be happy to help you get it set up.

Oh, and if I didn't mention it already: that's free too.

Hope to see you guys on!

Not that there's many of you HoB'ers out there that play quake, but the European Championship finals are going on today in Cologne. No Americans in there (no surprise really), but there's no shortage of talent if you want to see some awesome shots, mid-air rockets, and teleports galore.

These guys have got some serious skills, and it's entertaining even if you've never played the game at all...

You can watch the live feed at this link, or by clicking the image below:.

If you've been living under a rock for the past 48 hours, the biggest news right now is that the Republic of Haiti was built on a fault line and is now suffering the consequences of geo-parkinsons disease.

Previous to the quake, if you've never heard of it, Haiti was an impoverished nothingstate that made little difference to the world.

Bill Clinton states that 'We Can Rebuild' Haiti." Fortunately for us, that won't be very difficult since the population of the country has been reduced by half and almost all of the popsicle sticks that composed the original infrastructure are still there. It's really just a big game of pick-up sticks (and bodies) before it's right back to its orignal shambles!

Now that a few thousand people have died as a direct result of an inevitable, predictable disaster, veritably every wealthy country in the world is suddenly somehow giving a shit. Personally I've never met a Haitian except the ones that shot at me in Grand Theft Auto: Vice City, and in my opinion those coke-running mexican'ts got their just-dessert. Besides, everyone knew that country was going to hell back when they signed that pact with the devil.

In related news, your local Sonic is running a special on Haiti shakes to celebrate. Sounds pretty tasty: "Bananas and Chocolate chips to remind you of the fallen trees and shattered earth, with Strawberry syrup so sweet you can almost taste the tragedy so many just suffered!" Get yours now while they last!

Sorry about the lack of updates lately. To make up for it, please allow me to wish you all a happy Newhanukwanzmas Year, you illiterate lazy cuntbuttons that refuse to update the blog yourselves while I'm out. You know, it takes a lot of hard work to offend this many people at once...